A Note From The Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist
Read on to learn how you can help your teen deal with bullying. – Sandra
Has anyone ever intimidated you, or made you feel less than them? Perhaps it was a parent, a teacher, a neighbor, an employer, or a spouse. The feeling was probably one of helplessness and despair, along with perhaps some anger and the desire for revenge.
People often define things by right and wrong, good and bad, different and similar. When countries go to war over over religion and people are judged for the color of their skin or romantic preference, what lessons are we teaching our teens?
When little Johnnie hits a friend for taking his toy, there is an opportunity to teach him how to share. When bigger Johnnie mocks his classmate for his handicap or learning disability, there is an opportunity to teach him about diversity.
If your teen frequently hears you talk down about others, or experiences you using intimidation to get them to do what you want, you may be teaching them how to be bullies, or victims. I invite you to consider the possibility of using your behavior to teach lessons of respect, compassion and acceptance.
As for parents of the victims being bullied, there will always be people who don’t treat your teen in the way you would like. But if you help your teen to have a strong sense of self love, they can respond in ways that avoid giving bullies satisfaction.
There are ways to handle insults that remove their sting. For example, if someone makes a mocking comment about one’s clothes, hair, accent, or physical features, a response you could suggest to your teen might be to simply say: “Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Thank you for sharing yours.”
If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.
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