Santa Monica Teen Therapist & Family Counselor |Teen Social Skills & Support Groups | Teen & Young Adult Life Skills Coach

Photo journey of 4/27 Teen Leadership Training

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Sun, 28 Apr 2013 17:05:42 +0000

This is the pond that greets us when we first arrive.

Mesa Ranch – the site of our training – is a haven for rescued animals.

The peacocks are playing “ring around the rosie” on this structure.

Cassandra prepares our lunch of local farm fresh produce.

This is the space for our group discussion.

Here is our shady viewing perch.

Cassandra preps the girls on safety around horses.

Our assistant brings in the first half of the horse team.
Meet Java and Gringo…

We spend a little time watching
and commenting on the horse’s relationships with each other.
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Now it’s time to enter the arena.

One team task is to erect a fence.

Spotted Horse – the stallion – decides it’s time for a nap.

So we move closer to share in a moment of peace.

Another task was for the team to set-up
and then lead their horse through an obstacle course.

Here are the girls strategizing on how best to do this.

Testing out the obstacle course they just created.

Each participant gets an opportunity to lead.

Good job ladies!

Leading is not necessarily accomplished by being the loudest or most bossy. There are many different styles of leading. Some prefer to be independent leaders. Others may prefer to collaborate. Learn more about your authentic leadership style.

Are you ready to join in the fun?

We will be offering continuous new trainings throughout the summer, one Saturday a month. In this manner, participants are able to join one or more of these sessions, as their schedule permits.

Dates: May 18, Jun 22, Jul 27, Aug 24, Sep 21

Time: 10:00 am – 4:00 pm

Age: Young women aged 14-16

Rate: $220 per session

* Includes lunch; local organic produce

A Deposit of $100 is required to reserve your preferred participation dates. Details and directions for the event will be sent to you the week before your first meeting date. Participants must provide proof of medical insurance and will be interviewed by phone prior to acceptance into the program.

To Register for any session in this series please contact: info@thereflectivehorse.com

RESERVE YOUR SPACE TODAY!

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

tags: Find a Family Therapist, FREE Parent Consultations,Parent Coaching,Parenting Classes, Santa Monica Family Therapy and Counseling, Teen and Adolescent Therapist and Counselor, Teen Support Groups

Effective Parenting of Teens

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 14:56:17 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

Now that the school year is almost done, consider using the summer months to strengthen your relationship with your teen. - Sandra

Leading By Example

When children observe how we treat them and others, they learn how to behave. A parent’s interaction with their child literally impacts their child’s brain development, and parenting styles can be passed down through generations.

In our society, shaming is an accepted parenting tool for controlling kids. Many children hear shaming and humiliating messages all day long: comparisons with siblings or other kids, the mocking of their age and abilities or comments that just make them feel stupid or inferior. I would like to invite our society to relearn respect and civility, both of which start at home.

Modeling Respect of Self and Others

As parents, we are responsible for modeling self-respect and respect for others. When we treat children with respect, they learn to treat themselves and others respectfully.

Our body language, facial expressions, the tone and volume of our voice, threatening violence, withholding affection, rejecting behavior, using demeaning words or physical punishment definitely impact a child’s self-esteem and can teach them aggressive behavior. The foundation of any respectful argument involves avoiding the following: raising your voice, swearing, name-calling and pointing your finger in the other person’s face.

In my 6-week Effective Parenting Teens Class, you will learn how to effectively help your teenager become more responsible, respectful, communicative and independent.

Topics will include:

Understanding Yourself and Your Teenager
Improving Your Response to Your Teen
How to Communicate Respect and Understanding
Encouraging Cooperation and Problem‐Solving
Using Consequences to Build Responsibility

**Recommended for parents with children between the ages of 11 and 19.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Empowering Shy Adolescents

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Tue, 16 Apr 2013 22:32:34 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

I work with adolescents one-on-one to identify areas where they can improve their social skills, and teach them tips and tricks to improve those skills. – Sandra

TEENS LEARN:
* Conflict management
* How to be more assertive
* How to gain and keep more friends
* How to be confident in social situations

Give the teen in your life the gift of empowerment.

TOPICS COVERED:
* First Impressions
* Making connections
* The art of conversation
* Re-directing your anger
* Helpful responses to bullying
* Understanding adults in authority
* Improving your relationship with parents
* Effectively communicating your needs to others
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6-week Social/Life Skills Coaching Packages

for Teens & Young Adults

20% discount off pre-paid packages.

Worried About Your Teen? Schedule a FREE Parent Consultation.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

ADOLESCENT THERAPIST | PARENT COACH | TEEN MENTOR

tags: Find a Family Therapist, FREE Parent Consultations, Parent Coaching, Parenting Classes, Santa Monica Family Therapy and Counseling, Teen and Adolescent Therapist and Counselor, Teen Support Groups
.

Creating Family Togetherness

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Sun, 14 Apr 2013 18:12:05 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

From television viewing, to Internet surfing, to text messaging – people are now spending more time with their phones and computers than with their families. How is this affecting your teen? – Sandra

BALANCING EMOTIONS
The co-regulation of emotional states, once available to teens through sharing with their parents, appear to be getting interrupted by less emotionally fulfilling forms of interaction. I am noticing that this situation is leaving teenagers less equipped to handle the pressures of their live as well as navigate the waters of intimate relationships.

TECHNOLOGY AS A DISTRACTION
Father’s who used to take the weekend off can now be seen answering calls or emails in the middle of a family activity. Teens who once used to sit down together for dinner and talk to their parents or siblings, now text their friends instead of speaking to the person sitting right next to them.

PARENTS LEAD BY EXAMPLE
As a therapist for teens, I feel it is essential for parents to set aside time to provide their teenager with focused, non-judgmental attention. This will allow them to expand their parent-child interactions, and develop a secure and joyful bond between them and their teen.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR SPENDING QUALITY TIME WITH YOUR TEEN:
1. Set aside 20 minutes a day where there are no interruptions. Turn off cell phones and try to pick a time when you do not have other things that either of you need to be doing.

2. Let your teenager know that this time will be your special time together, and that you have no expectations on how this time will look.

3. Follow your adolescent’s lead. Talk about whatever they want to talk about. Discover what they want from you during this time. Do they want you to admire them? Respond to them but do not take over and direct them.

4. Observe, and make space to wonder about what your teen is telling you. Enter their world and reflect on their experience of life.

5. Avoid giving advice or showing displeasure with what they are offering to share with you.

6. Instead, make observations and/or ask questions about what you hear. (”You sound proud of yourself. What are you planning to do next?”)

7. Have fun. Try to give yourself over completely to the enjoyment of a glimpse into your teenager’s life. You will only find it boring if your mind is stuck in the adult world. Try to be entirely present with your teen. Your adolescent will tell you a lot about themselves and their world if you allow yourself to be receptive.

8. Remember this is not a teaching time. Try to avoid praising or criticizing. You want the motivation of making good choices to ultimately come from within the teenager rather than through praise or punishment.

9. Sometimes, these conversations may elicit strong reactions or uncomfortable feelings on the part of the parent. These reactions may be helpful to reflect on in a supportive setting, like with a parent educator, therapist or another parent you feel safe with. It is important to understand what your feelings mean in regards to your relationship with your child.

10. Try to spend some quality time together every day, particularly during times of stress in the teen or family’s life.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

How To Choose A Family Therapist

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:23:39 +0000

What advice do you have for parents looking to hire a family therapist?
Not every therapist is a match for your family. You will want to take into consideration their background and training, as well as whether their areas of expertise align with your needs. Ideally, choose a family therapist with whom you feel understood and comfortable.

The reason I offer families with teens a FREE Initial Parent Consultation is to give you the opportunity to get a better sense of who I am–and how I work. By learning more about the symptoms your family is experiencing, I am better able to make recommendations on how to address the challenges your family is struggling with.

What should potential clients know about your profession?
Not all family therapists have had experience working with the teen population. Along with my Marriage and Family Therapist education, I have advanced training in Child Specialization Studies and Adolescent Psychology/Mental Development and seven years experience as practicing counselor for teenagers.

I specialize in coaching and therapy for adolescents and their families. I currently write a Teen Advice Blog and have a book on Amazon.com called “What Would Your Teen Life Coach Say? A Survival Guide for Girls Entering High School”

What information should parents think through before seeking you out?
It is important for you as a parent to reflect on the question, “What do I hope to get out of the experience of therapy?” prior to your consultation. It is also beneficial for you to visualize the outcome you desire and answer the question “If you woke up tomorrow, and things were exactly as you would like them to be, how would they look different than they do now?”

It is be helpful to examine your readiness to embrace the changes that may be necessary for you–and your family–to make. It is important to realize that family therapy is a collaborative relationship, and parents need to reinforce my work at home.

How does your work stand out from other family therapists?
I specialize in working with diverse multicultural clientele as well as sensitive and creative individuals. I help parents get the whole picture of what’s going on in their teen’s mind, including the neurological changes that occur during adolescence.

Worried about your teen? Schedule a Free parent consultation.

For more information, please visit my website:

www.SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Serving: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood

Experiential Teen Leadership Training

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 18:10:38 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen Therapist

Our Teen Leadership & Empowerment Program allows participants to practice essential life skills in a unique way. It’s time to reserve your space in the training beginning this month, on April 27th! – Sandra

**Note: No prior horse experience is necessary in this work. Participants are taught to understand horses and their nature, and how to stay safe while engaging with them.

Horses can change a teen’s life.

.
Horses can instill confidence and self-esteem.

.
Horses can introduce peace and tranquility.

.
Horses can teach young people about themselves and others.

Horses are highly perceptive and non-judgmental.

Horses communicate best with a person’s true self

Though observing and interacting with horses, teens learn about herd dynamics, and how they are a reflection of their own social and family environments. By understanding that everyone has a role in the herd, teens come to better understand their own position and role within their community.

Since horses respond in a non-judgmental way, teens discover how to respond in more effective ways without feeling defensive. Being highly perceptive animals, horses communicate with who teens are on the inside, rather than an image they project.

Our intention is for participants to learn how to make more conscious choices and work through situations that they find uncomfortable. They will also increase their ability to work within a team and learn how to peacefully resolve conflicts. The ultimate goal is to support teens in developing authentic connections with their peers, family and community.

When: First session begins Saturday April 27, 2013 with continuing sessions available - Saturdays: May 18, Jun 22, Jul 27, Aug 24, Sep 21
From: 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.
Who: Teen girls aged 16 – 19 (maximum of 12 participants)
Rate: $220 person/program (20% discount for full 6 sessions)

*Includes lunch; local organic produce

Participants are welcome to sign up for one, or more, of the 6 of the sessions, and join any time during the program.
.

To Register for this Program

RSVP BY SAT, APRIL 13: info@thereflectivehorse.com

(Deposit of $100 is required by WEDNESDAY, APRIL 17)

Teen Safety Begins With Communication

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:35:19 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

Teens can be impulsive, rebellious and not always conscious of the consequences of their behavior. Here are my thoughts on supporting your teen. – Sandra

AGREE TO DISAGREE
First, and foremost, you want to maintain open lines of communication between you and your teen. Yes, I understand that this is sometimes easier said than done. Consider the possibility of agreeing to disagree; for there is value in being able to talk to them, as well as listening to what they are telling you.

ALLOW TEENS A SAFE SPACE TO SPEAK
I have found that teens can be very forthright and honest. They often want to tell you about the mischief they are conceiving, as they are quite proud of themselves. For every secretive child, there are 5 more who don’t think twice about enthusiastically sharing about some of the outrageous things they are planning — or have done.

AVOID MAKING QUICK JUDGMENTS
Try not to shut them down with quick judgments. If they are open to sharing with you, you have an opportunity to use that conversation to help them explore and understand the possible consequences of their behavior. Ask questions like: “So what do you imagine could be some potential problems with building a bike ramp off of the roof into the pool?”

PASS ON YOUR WISDOM
Teens are amazing. Teens are wonderful. They are also oblivious of the fragility of these human bodies we reside in. They think they are invincible and will live forever. Do you remember when you used to feel that way? The good news is that you survived your Teen Years. Now it’s your turn to pass on your wisdom–to this next generation.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Teen Leadership Training Description

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Sat, 23 Mar 2013 14:36:07 +0000

Meet some members of our team…

This is the corral where most of the activities takes place.

This is the viewing stand, along with the covered cabana where lunch will be held.

Part of the time will be viewing the horses’ relationships and personalities,
and discussing how they may reflect our own.

Horses relate to each other in ways the participants will recognize in themselves.

Taking time to get to know the horse that chooses you
will tell you a lot about how you relate to others.

Learning how to lead requires finding a confident and solid place within yourself.

Safety is our first commitment
and participants will fully understand how to stay safe around a horse.

The participants will be given fun tasks to complete as a team,
with each person getting an opportunity to practice leading.

Description of Activities

Are you ready to join in the fun?

Due to an enthusiastic response by families with younger children, we decided to expand the age range for our Teen Leadership & Empowerment Training Series to include 14-16 year old girls. We will be offering continuous new trainings throughout the summer, one Saturday a month. In this manner, participants are able to join one or more of these sessions, as their schedule permits.

Dates: Apr 27, May 18, Jun 22, Jul 27, Aug 24, Sep 21

Time: 10:00 am – 4:00 pm

Age: Young women aged 14-16

Rate: $220 per session

* Includes lunch; local organic produce

To Register for any session in this series please contact: info@thereflectivehorse.com

*NOTE: There are still a few spaces available in the training on Saturday, April 27, 2013.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Santa Monica Teen Therapist – Active Links

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Fri, 22 Mar 2013 14:40:52 +0000

Active Links for LA Teen Therapist – Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Safe Driving Contract For Teens & Parents

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 17:23:55 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen Therapist

Due to limited experience and still evolving maturity, there is a high rate of accident involvement among first year teen drivers. - Sandra

Here are some thoughts on how to help keep your “newly driving” teenager safe:

Parents, guardians, and older peers have a responsibility to model safe driving behavior. Teens may misinterpret unsafe driving behavior as acceptable if they see you doing it. Please be conscious of the example you are setting. Since teens are comparing what they are learning in driver’s education, it is important to demonstrate what you expect of them.

A “Parent/Youth Safe Driving Contract” can be used to help you discuss safe driving issues with your teen. Here is the link to one offered by the I Promise Program. http://www.ipromiseprogram.com/PYSDC.pdf

Developed together with youth, parents, and community members it helps families to prevent & address issues related to new or young driver car crashes. This contract highlights several issues regarding driving and responsibilities. By entering into this contract, you are making a commitment to each other to drive safely. I suggest you complete the contract together with your teen, discussing each issue, and ultimately reaching agreement on the items that best fit your family’s needs.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

NEW Teen Girl Leadership Program

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 15:37:54 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen Therapist

It takes confidence, connection, collaboration and creativity for today’s young women to go forth and succeed in the world. - Sandra

Introducing a horse-assisted Teen Leadership Program that instills power, passion & purpose into teen girl’s lives.

Utilizing the natural inquisitive and responsive nature of horses, we expand participant’s awareness by opening up new perspectives on relationship, communication, trust, team work, intention & boundaries. Through hands-on activities and mindfulness exercises with horses, our experiential program allows teen girls to practice essential life skills in a unique way, refining inter-personal skills and developing the character strengths that will help them to prosper and thrive.

The Teen Leadership Program for teen girls begins in April of 2013, facilitated by Cassandra Ogier & Sandra Dupont

When: Saturday April 27, 2013

with continuing sessions

Saturdays: May 18, Jun 29, Jul 27, Aug 24, Sep 21

(participants are welcome to join one – or more – of these sessions)

From: 10.00 am – 4.00 pm

Who: Young women aged 16 – 19 (max 12 participants)

Rate: $220 person/session (20% discount for full 6 sessions)

*Includes lunch; local organic produce

To Register for this Program RSVP BY SAT, APRIL 13: info@thereflectivehorse.com

Deposit of $100 is required by WEDNESDAY, APRIL 17

**Note: -BY INVITATION ONLY- No horse experience is necessary as there is no riding, only on-the-ground interactions. Participants must be 16 years old or over. Participants must provide proof of medical insurance. All prospective participants will be interviewed by Sandra Dupont prior to acceptance into the program.

What Our Clients Say:

“Sandra understands teenagers on a deeply emotional level and has a completely unique way of relating to them.” – Santa Monica Parent

“Cassandra is a passionate leader committed to working with people and horses, helping them to develop positive self-esteem and effective communication skills. She offers clients an opportunity to grow self-awareness at the same time as being guided by the horses to a place of deeper connection with themselves, others and the earth” - Anni Townend, Psychologist and Author

For questions, contact Sandra (310) 951-5678 or email her at sandra@sandradupontmft.com

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Avoiding Teen Power Struggles

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Thu, 28 Feb 2013 15:09:52 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

During the teen years, it is vital that parents understand their teen’s behavior rather than merely react to it. - Sandra

Why teens and parents often struggle during the teen years:

1. Teens feel conditionally loved: “I’m OK only if I live up to your expectations.”
2. Parents don’t often allow teens to learn from failure, an excellent motivator.
3. Teens can’t learn time management skills simply through the creation of “daily routine” charts.
4. Parents gift their kids too many things and then wonder why teens are unappreciative and want more.
5. Teens don’t learn problem-solving skills when parents lecture them.
6. Parents don’t always calmly and simply say, “I love you, and the answer is no.”
7. Parents struggle with being kind and firm while holding teens accountable.
8. Parents too often tell their teen what to do rather than inviting them to brainstorm solutions.
9. Parents expect teens to “remember to do their chores” which is not a developmental guarantee.
10. Parents are often more interested in short-term results. For example: I’ll force you to do your homework now even if it means you will not do your best – because you are rebelling.
11. Parents nag, which invites resistance, instead of allowing teens to explore for themselves the relevance of what you want them to do.

Being a “drill sergeant” or a “helicopter parent” can undermine a teen’s self-esteem, which preventing them from developing confidence in their own abilities. Successfully navigating this phase of life involves setting boundaries and enforcing consequences without becoming punitive, angry, or judgmental.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Conscious and Respectful Parenting

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 15:00:22 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

Conscious parenting involves pausing to evaluate whether your words or actions are necessary. - Sandra

What Is Conscious Parenting?

Conscious parenting involves pausing before speaking or acting to evaluate whether our words or actions are necessary. (Will your words or actions truly help the situation?) Encouraging your child should never include a demeaning or threatening word, nor should it cause them to lose their dignity or self-respect. Instead, encouragement should inspire and uplift them, guiding them toward a path of hope and possibility.

When children act out, disobey, behave rudely or display disturbing emotions, it’s easy to dismiss them or their behavior as “bad” or “wrong”; however, as we go about redirecting and disciplining our children, it’s helpful to see these behaviors as a child’s best attempt to meet a need. It calls upon us to look at our relationship with our child, and find the source of their unmet need.

Keeping Your Eyes On The Goal

Although it can at times be exhausting to cope with the challenges and demands typical of this period, parents need to deal with mis-behavior in a straightforward, honest way that affirms the dignity and power of both parent and child. The parent who cannot tolerate their teen expressing their autonomy and wanting to do things independently will make that child feel as though the price of their own freedom is abandonment and loss of love.

Respectful parenting means being able to see the frustrations teens encounter when pushing against imposed boundaries as opportunities for them to exercise self-control, self-respect and respect for others.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Setting Social Media Limits For Teens

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Fri, 01 Feb 2013 14:45:51 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

Are you aware of how much time your teen spends on the computer each day? – Sandra

Has social media taken over your teen’s life?

Call me old fashioned, but to me, the purpose of Facebook is to let the folks who care about you, but can’t see or speak with you every day (like grandparents, best friends, or kids away at college) get a glimpse into how you are doing and perhaps spending your days. It is not about obsessively creating posts for each and every thing you think or do.

Questions For Parents To Ponder:

1. How much time does your teen spend on the computer each day?

2. Do you ever limit their time on the computer?

3. Does your teen spend more time on the computer than actually seeing their friends?

4. Does looking at Facebook every make your teen feel lonely or sad?

5. Does your teen ever complain of online fights or cyber-bullying?

6. Has your teen ever lost their Facebook privileges for neglecting their schoolwork by being online too much?

7. Does your teen have hobbies outside of using the computer?

8. Do you ever feel like you can’t get your teen to step away from their computer?

9. Does your teen ever use instant messaging on Facebook because they are too shy to speak directly to someone?

10. If your teen did not have a computer (or cell phone), how might they stay in contact with their friends?

If you teen is spending too much time on the computer, then you may want to consider helping them to cut back, replacing screen time with time spent on homework, with family and friends, or getting some fresh air and exercise. Here is one solution that I have recommended to parents: Net Nanny Parental Control Software

Net Nanny^® provides:

Ease of use
Remote management
Alerts and reporting
Time controls
Profanity masking
Monitoring of IM chats

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupontMFT.com

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Is Facebook A Popularity Contest?

Sandra Dupont MA, MS, MFT, Santa Monica Family Counselor — Mon, 28 Jan 2013 14:37:25 +0000

A Note From The Santa Monica Family Therapist

In order to be eligible to sign up for Facebook, kids must be 13 years of age or older. - Sandra

Is Facebook Healthy For Teens?

In a presentation I gave recently at a local middle school, I learned that many of the kids who have Facebook pages were under 13, and did not really understand the purpose of Facebook.

Many teens and preteens seem to think that Facebook was designed as a popularity contest. Therefore, their intention in posting is to get people to “like” their posts and “friend” them. This can lead some teens to obsess over whether they are getting enough “likes’ and who has more friends.

Glued to their computers after school (or sometimes during, if they have the phone app) they stalk their peer’s Facebook pages to check for updates. Instead of using this website as a way to merely share special moments with people they care about, and who care about them, they set out to prove something – that they are worthy of attention.

An Unnecessary Distraction?

Some teens go to such extremes as to post inappropriate photos of themselves and others, not recognizing the long-term consequences of those images floating around on the Internet – forever. Other teens engage in cyber-bullying, using the Facebook medium as a way to bash others and knock them down.

There is a maturity level that allows a young person to recognize who are actually their friends and to feel secure in, as well as nurture those relationships. I fear that 13 may be too young for many kids to have this level of emotional maturity. Until a child is able to step away from the computer on their own volition to attend to their homework and other responsibilities, Facebook may be an unnecessary distraction.

Worried About Your Teen? FREE Parent Consultation