Private Parent-Coaching Workshop

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

I can help you learn how to strengthen your relationship with you adolescent. – Sandra

When teens observe how we treat them and others, they learn how to behave. A parent’s interaction with their teen literally impacts their child’s brain development, and parenting styles are often passed down through generations.

Unfortunately, in our society, shaming is an accepted parenting tool for controlling teens. Many teens hear shaming and humiliating messages all day long: comparisons with siblings or other kids, the mocking of their age and abilities, or comments that make them feel stupid or inferior.

It is important to remember that respect and civility both start at home. As a parent, you are responsible for modeling both self-respect, and respect for others. When you treat your teen with respect, they will learn to treat themselves and others respectfully.

Your body language, facial expressions, the tone & volume of your voice, threatening violence, withholding affection, rejecting behavior, demeaning words or physical punishment all directly impact your teen’s self-esteem and can even teach them aggressive behavior. The foundation of respectful disagreements involve avoiding raising your voice, swearing, name-calling or pointing your finger in the teen’s face.

In my 6-week Private Parent Coaching Workshop, you will learn how to effectively help your teenager become more responsible, respectful, communicative and independent.

Topics will include:

  • Understanding Yourself and Your Teenager
  • Improving Your Response to Your Teen
  • How to Communicate Respect and Understanding
  • Encouraging Cooperation and Problem‐Solving
  • Using Consequences to Build Responsibility

**Recommended for parents with children between the ages of 11 and 19.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Parenting Teens versus Younger Children

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

The parenting role must shift during the teen years to supporting their growing independence and preparing them to meet the challenges & frustrations of daily life. – Sandra

Parents need to make the transition from being a parent who provides for all their child’s needs to who coaching their teen to handle their frustrations and needs for themselves. The challenge is how to deal with the stubbornness, clinginess, or demands typical of this phase of life.

Parents need to be able to deal with their teen’s expressed frustration and/or dependence in ways that affirm the dignity and power of both you and your child. If you cannot tolerate your teen choosing to defy you by asserting their independence, they may come to fee feel as though the price of their autonomy will abandonment and the loss of your love.

Successful navigation of the adolescent phase of life involves setting boundaries and enforcing consequences without your becoming punitive, angry, or judgmental. Respectful parenting involves seeing the frustrations your teen is encountering when pushing against your imposed boundaries as opportunities for them to learn self-control, self-respect, and respect for others.

Your responsibility as a parent is to teach your child the skills they will need to succeed in the world prior to leaving your home. Respectful, conscious and positive parenting is at it’s core: fair, flexible, and has learning, rather than submission as its ultimate goal. Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on your part gives your teen some message about self-worth.

Allowing them choices, while setting fair and clear limits on unacceptable behavior, is a healthy balance to strive for. Some parents use authoritarian strategies that do not allow the child an independent voice or sense of autonomy. Other parents overcompensate with overly permissive parenting that doesn’t teach their kids about limits and self-control. Research shows both extremes can interfere with kids’ ability to regulate their emotions.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Frequently Yelling At Your Teen?

A Note From the Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

Do you sometimes get so frustrated with your teen’s behavior that you find yourself yelling? – Sandra

Stepping away for a moment to keep yourself from exploding may give you space to determine what actions could actually help your teen move beyond their inappropriate behavior. Taking a deep breath whenever you feel stressed and overwhelmed can help calm your nerves and bring your thoughts into a more a peaceful alignment.

Once you feel ready to discuss your teen’s behavior, try expressing curiosity about their choices instead of judgment. In this manner, you are able to learn more about their motivation and point of view. Utilize their mistakes as an opportunity to help them to grow by creating a discussion where you respectfully impart your life wisdom.

Remember, you don’t have to fix everything today. Sometimes there is value in teaming up with a teen specialist who can help you explore solutions. Remember the old saying that it takes a village to raise a child? Let me support you in becoming the best parent you can be!

Adolescent counselor, family therapist and respectful parenting coach for over 10 years based in Santa Monica, California.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

What Would A Teen Therapist Say?

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

I gently guide teens in thinking about who they truly are, what they want, and how to express themselves with kindness and grace.- Sandra

For teens in need of guidance during one of the most difficult transitions in life, I help them to become independent, self-aware and self-fulfilled young adults. In my book, What Would Your Teen Therapist Say?: A Workbook For Discovering Your True Self-Expression, I present weekly tasks and then provides space for readers to work through the self-reflection process in writing.

Thought-provoking themes in the workbook include listening closely to your conversations to make sure you’re saying what you really mean; paying attention to how you spend your time to determine the worthiness of those activities; examining your belief system to see if it still fits; or asking if yourself if your friends support you and your dreams.

I also invite the reader to identify inspirational moments in their own lives, and challenge them to find success in their failures, along with encouraging them to share the gift of their wisdom with others. Each weekly lesson prompts young readers to answer questions or imagine various scenarios designed to focus on the positive or help the reader develop courage and confidence.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Middle School Girls and “Dating”

A Note From the Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

If your Middle School daughter is expressing interest in “dating” boys, here is a conversation worth having with her.,-Sandra

Middle School is a great time for teens girls to become friends with guys and learn who they feel comfortable around. Does your daughter like to be with guys who are funny? What about smart? Does it matter if the guy is drop dead gorgeous, if he is not a kind to her?

Teach your teen not to be in a rush to find someone just because some of their friends may have declared they have a “boyfriend”. If the guy she likes does not show interest in her, encourage her to move on … because not everyone is going to appreciate her charm and beauty.

If she has a crush on someone, she should just act normal by smiling and saying “hi” when she sees him. Should he stop and ask a question, she can be friendly and start a conversation, like finding out about his hobbies, or what he likes to do on his weekends. She wants to get to know him as a person.

What she really wants to know is whether he is the kind of guy who enjoys her company and treats her with respect. She needs to learn how to take good care of her feelings by choosing to hang around guys who prove themselves to be true friends.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Does Teen Popularity Require Being Mean?

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen  & Family Therapist

Teen girls don’t always recognize the price they pay for giving up their values to be popular. Here is a conversation worth having with your daughter. – Sandra

I imagine that you have an idea of how your life would be different, and somehow better, if you became more popular. It might be helpful to write down the things you think you would gain by becoming a popular girl at your school. Also write down a list of things that you might also need to give up in order to gain that popular status.

Would being popular mean that you always have to be concerned with how you look, or what other people are saying about you? Would you need to gossip, or be rude to others? Would you be constantly worrying whether someone else is more popular than you? How would you know who your true friends are?

Not all popular girls are mean and not all mean girls are popular. Being mean may be an indication that someone is not very happy. People who choose to be hurtful, and rejecting of others, may be struggling with some insecurities that they try to hide by appearing tough, or overly confident.

Being popular can actually be an opportunity to make a positive difference in your world. Like the celebrities who use their influence to help others, you could be a positive role model that your classmates look up to. And, if you choose to pursue popularity, please don’t forget the people who already love you for who you are.

Is your teen stressed out or anxious about school or friends?

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Spending Quality Time With Your Teen

A Note From the Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

It is essential that parents provide their teenager with focused, non-judgmental attention.  – Sandra

The co-regulation of emotional states once available to teens through sharing with their parents, is getting interrupted by less emotionally fulfilling forms of interaction. This situation is leaving teenagers less equipped to handle the pressures of their live as well as navigate the waters of intimate relationships.

Parents who used to take the weekend off can now be seen answering calls or emails in the middle of a family activity. Teens who used to sit down together for dinner and talk to their parents or siblings now text their friends instead of speaking to the person sitting right next to them.

As a therapist for teens, I feel it is essential for parents to set aside time to provide their teenager with focused, non-judgmental attention. This will allow them to expand their parent-child interactions, and develop a secure and joyful bond between them and their teen.

1. Set aside 20 minutes a day where there are no interruptions. Turn off cell phones and try to pick a time when you do not have other things that either of you need to be doing.

2. Let your teenager know that this time will be your special time together, and that you have no expectations on how this time will look.

3. Follow your adolescent’s lead. Talk about whatever they want to talk about. Discover what they want from you during this time. Do they want you to admire them? Respond to them but do not take over and direct them.

4. Watch, wait and wonder about what your teen is telling you. Enter their world and reflect on their experience of life.

5. Avoid giving advice or showing displeasure with what they are offering to share with you.

6. Instead, make observations and/or ask questions about what you hear. (”You sound proud of yourself. What are you planning to do next?”)

7. Have fun. Try to give yourself over completely to the enjoyment of a glimpse into your teenager’s life. You will only find it boring if your mind is stuck in the adult world. Try to be entirely present with your teen. Your adolescent will tell you a lot about themselves and their world if you allow yourself to be receptive.

8. Remember this is not a teaching time. Try to avoid praising or criticizing. You want the motivation of making good choices to ultimately come from within the teenager rather than through praise or punishment.

9. Sometimes, these conversations may elicit strong reactions or uncomfortable feelings on the part of the parent. These reactions may be helpful to reflect on in a supportive setting, like with a parent educator, therapist or another parent you feel safe with. It is important to understand what your feelings mean in regards to your relationship with your child.

10. Try to spend quality time every day, particularly during times of stress in the teen or family’s life.

Last, but not least, make sure to also leave 20 minutes a day for yourself to rest, relax, and do something just for you. (Catching up on household tasks does not count) This time allows you to restore yourself.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Is Your Teen In Crisis?

A Note From the Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

There is an unfulfilled need that is driving a teen’s negative behavior, and my goal is to help you and your teen find more effective ways to address that need. – Sandra

The best time to consult with me is when you have noticed changes in your teen’s behavior — impacting their ability to connect with others and cope with their challenges. As an experienced teen therapist, I can help assess the challenges your adolescent may be experiencing and offer you effective recommendations for solving the problem.

Together, we want to try and understand what is really underlying your teen’s struggle. Is this problem more complex than just an adolescent phase of life issue? Is educational testing indicated? Is social skills coaching a piece of the puzzle? Would parenting support help turn the situation around? Is referral to a medical doctor or other specialist indicated? As a seasoned professional, I can answer these questions.

If your teen is in crisis, I may suggest that we initially meet twice-a-week for about 6-weeks. In this manner, I can do a thorough assessment of the situation. During this time, your family will get an immediate and direct experience of the value I provide–without waiting for long periods of time to decide if I am being helpful.

My goal is to find solutions that will unite your family, rather than assigning blame to anyone.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

TV Shows Affect Your Teen’s Values

A Note From the Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

Parents of teens are often not be fully aware of video content being viewed by their teen.  – Sandra

Television shows continue to inform the behavior of today’s adolescents. Unfortunately, actors who are older than the teens they portray, can give the illusion that actions come without consequences. Yet this is not so in real life.

Trends in viewing are offering more images of violence, drug abuse, sexual promiscuity, misogynistic behavior than ever before. Teenagers are using these shows to model their behavior after–sadly, with dire consequences. Some teens are simply unable to separate reality from fiction, and are acting out this confusion.

Ideally, I think parents should determine age appropriate shows and set limits on viewing for pre-teens. With older teens, try and sit down to watch with them every so often, that you may be able to help your teen digest  and process the information that they are being exposed to.

Teen girls are exposed to at least 180 minutes of media daily. What can parents do? You can teach you teen how to look objectively at media portrayals of contemporary life and society, and invite conversations that create awareness of the unconscious messages they are being given about “normal” teen behavior, counter-balancing it with your family’s values.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.

Keeping Your Teenager Safe

A Note From The Santa Monica Teen & Family Therapist

Instead of staying in their immediate neighborhood, teens often go to nearby cities to meet up with their friends. – Sandra

Parents may think they know where their teen is, but this is not always the case. Telling a parent that they are spending the night at one friend’s, they get another parent to drive them across town to a party, working out their ride home however they can.

It is important to know who your teen’s friends are. Also get to know who their friend’s parents are, that you might have a sense of the type of values they uphold in their homes. It is a wise parent who gets contact information for any sleep-overs or parties, including the address, phone number and the name of the adult in charge of the event. It is also responsible behavior to call and introduce yourself, verify the details, and get a feel for who that other parent is.

In your home, there may be strict curfews, as well as restrictions around alcohol and other mind-altering substances. But in other homes, parents sometimes turn a blind eye to their teen’s entertainment activities, including drinking, and unsupervised access to bedrooms. The boundaries you set for your teen shows your caring. Do not cave in under pressure when presented with the claim that “all the other parents let their kids …”

I assure you that there are plenty of parents who still expect their teens to earn their trust.

If your teen or young adult child is struggling socially or emotionally, I can help you to discover the cause and remedy it.

Menu of Services Offered:

Call Now to Schedule a Free Consultation!

Click to Call:

(310) 951-5678
.

For more information, please visit my website:

SandraDupont.com

verified by Psychology Today

Adolescent Therapist|Parent Coach|Teen Mentor

Providing service for: Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Pacific Palisades, Malibu, Beverly Hills, Beverly Glen, Culver City, Brentwood, Westwood, Marina Del Rey, Mar Vista, Encino, Sherman Oaks, Topanga Beach and Topanga Canyon, Ocean Park, Hancock Park, West Hollywood.